People and Drama

One thing I have tried to do is not write about things I don't have a lot of experience in. I have had way more experiences than I care to admit to, good, bad, and ugly. I have had people that I thought were close friends fall off the map, for reasons beyond me. I have had close friends turn into sales people, as in that's the only reason they talk to me anymore is to try to get me to sign up for or sell something. Its gotten severely frustrating. When I do see people the question always it "what are you doing now?". And when I say well I stay at home with the kids, the common response is "wow must be nice to have enough money to do that." Why because I stay home does that mean I am loaded? I am far from it! I am lucky if I can get all the bills paid in a single month without cutting out essential things, like groceries or clothes for the kids. I haven't bought a new pair of shoes for myself in almost three years. It frustrates me that I have to explain how I can afford to stay home. I don't ask you how can you afford to drive all over kingdom come and go out to do all these extra things and still live. I don't go do anything and you wonder how I can afford to stay home???

I have had lots of judgment placed on me for things that have happened over the years. I have always had more guy friends than girl friends, mostly because girls are dramatic, and most guys aren't. But just because I have male friends, does not mean I am secretly sleeping with them. A lot of the time when I have had a hoard of girl friends, nothing is a secret, and everybody seems to know everything. Secrets have been a foreign concept to most. It at one point got to the extent that I wouldn't talk about anything going on for fear of judgment not understanding or input, just lots and lots of judgment. I tried very hard to keep things to myself.

When I worked the whole place was a giant rumor mill, from regular customers, coworkers, management, and whoever, always seemed to know everything, even things that you didn't know were going on. Every time I talked to someone this giant mess of crap would "come out" and I would be given the third degree by any and everyone. Even if none of it was true, it would just be me in denial. I would hope I would know whats going on in my life, but apparently everyone else has always known better than I did. When did personal start meaning public?

I guess I am just feeling frustrated with humanity, I could write a book about everyone elses bull crap I have heard over the years, but unlike some I know when it's not my job to judge, or advertise people's skeletons, eventually they will do a fine job of that on their own.

People will always thrive on the drama, that is why I have learned to keep my drama to myself! (well for the most part anyway ) :)