10 things you don't say to your wife (unless you like the couch)

To all the husbands out there these are the things that will get you banished to the couch:

1. Do you need new razor blades or something?

2. Whats the matter have you started your period.

3. Is that supposed to fit like that?

4. So what is your thought on boob jobs?

5. That looked different before the kids.

6. You're in decent shape for having two little ones.

7. You a lot like youre mom.

8. Thats not how my mom did it.

9. Honey is that really how you're going to make that?

10. I heard kegels would help with that.

I figured if we were doing one for the girls we should do one for the guys. A sense of humor is an amazing thing. :)